Nihilistic Delusions
by Kukiko-Rei
Summary: Kaoru is the only child in the family, right? There is no one else except him, right? But why is everyone pointing to an invisible spot beside him and saying there was someone there? Family Fic...maybe...


**Author Note: This is a oneshot! I do not own any of the characters in here! Just the story! Okay, in any case, please enjoy! And oh yeah, I will update Wavering Faith sooner or later…heehee. Please bear with this lazy author! Besides, encountering some friendship problems. Like getting ignored by this friend while he or she goes with another…sigh…what do you guys think I should do? Asking yall for some advice! **

**Facebook: Kukiko Deadinthesoul**

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**Anyways haha, enjoy!**

**Plot: Kaoru is the only child in the family, right? There is no one else except him, right? But why is everyone pointing to an invisible spot beside him and saying there was someone there?**

**Nihilistic Delusions**

''Stop it! There is no one there!''

Covering his ears and ignoring the shouts of his maids, he ran up to his room and locked the door. He slid slowly down onto the cold, hard ground and felt tears glistening at the corner of his eyes. He quickly brushed them away and scowled at the little wet puddle on his finger.

Why do they insist that there was someone there? There was no one there at all! He could see perfectly and he could see that there was no one there. He was not crazy! Everyone always looked at him in that way! He hated it!

Moving his hands around the floor beside him, he felt an object touching the tip of his fingernails. Stealing a glance at it from the corner of his eye, his jaw tensed. It was a picture. But there was something wrong with it. There was two of him. The same eyes, the same hair colour, the same hairstyles, the same face…

**Hikaru**

The name sent shivers down his spine and he could feel tears threatening to leak out again. Hikaru was his beloved elder twin brother. They had created a world that was meant only for them. No one should have invaded their world until she came along.

The girl with the most innocent expression and the naivety that commoners usually possess but what disgusted him was that Hikaru had to fall in love with a commoner. A puppy dog crush was okay but love? Hikaru just had to fall in love with Fujioka Haruhi.

Kaoru remembered everything. Actually, he had a short attraction towards that girl but it all disappeared when Hikaru told him late that evening, that he liked her. So, being the nice little brother he was, he gave her up to him. Immediately, he regretted his , they were happy together, just the two of them. After setting up the date between Hikaru and Haruhi, everything went downhill. All Hikaru could talk about was her. It was Haruhi this, Haruhi that. He was no longer the brother he used to love.

He shook his head, disrupting his train of thoughts. Why was he thinking this way? Hikaru was his brother! Why was he feeling a mixture of conflicting feelings? The one emotion which stood out the most was jealousy. Kaoru chuckled silently. It looks like the green-eyed monster had struck again.

''It is too bad though…dear brother…you are already dead…''

Gliding his hand smoothly along the handrail of the staircase, he moved down towards the living room slowly. He was deep in thought. The maids and servants could sense their master's distress and looked at each other worriedly. His behavior changed after Hikaru got into a car accident. He started saying delusional stuff and cooped himself in the room.

''Ah…good morning, Kaoru-sama. Your lunch is ready in the dining room.'' The maid began, fiddling with the hem of her apron nervously. Kaoru nodded, acknowledging her words and headed towards the dining table. He plopped down onto the chair and clapped his hands together. The maid frowned. Something was wrong…again.

''Itadakimasu.''

Instead of eating, he picked at his food, rolling the meatball around the plate.

''Kaoru-sama. You shouldn't be playing with your food.'' An older maid, Tsubaki, chided. Kaoru gave her the faintest of all smiles. Tsubaki had been with him since he was a young child. Since his parents was always away, Tsubaki acted as his second mother. She taught him everything she knew whereas Hikaru chose to sit at the sidelines and watch our interaction.

''Sorry, Tsubaki-san. I just have something on my mind now…'' Kaoru's voice trailed off as memories of the past resurfaced again. Frown lines creased his forehead and he let out a troubled sigh again. A comforting hand settled itself on his shoulder, making Kaoru look at the kind, smiling face.

''Penny for your thoughts?''

Kaoru contemplated for awhile. Tsubaki waited for him patiently. He needed time to think. He needed to think if she was worthy enough to tell her his troubles. That shows that whatever he was thinking of now was a serious matter. Looking up at him and revealing a dreary expression, he turned away again and closed his eyes.

''Yes, Kaoru-sama?''

''Tsubaki, Hikaru…''

Tsubaki's eyes widened and an awkward smile crept slowly on her face. She turned her head to the chair next to him and Kaoru followed her gaze. He tilted his head when she nodded her head as if he was not there.

''What about Hikaru-sama?''

''Why…why do everyone say that he is there? Isn't he dead?''

''K-kaoru-sama''

''Why do they say that! He is dead, isn't he! He was in that bloody car accident! I saw his dead body!''

''No, Kaoru-sama! Hikaru-sama never died! He is still here! He is still living!''

Covering her mouth and looking over to the spot next to Kaoru, she backed away slowly. Dropping the knife and fork that he was he was holding, he stood up.

''Wh-what do you mean?'' Kaoru looked at her with pleading eyes. ''I am..I am not crazy! Why do you look at me with those eyes?''

Shoving her aside, he ran outside the grand mansion, towards the place which he always went to. Unbeknownst to him, Tsubaki was caught by an invisible force before she fell to the ground.

[Tsubaki's Point of view]

''Thank you, Hikaru-sama. I am grateful,'' Tsubaki said before bowing down in respect. The spot was now occupied by the mirror image of Kaoru. The man who stared into the direction which Kaoru ran off to, turned back to her.

''Tsubaki…''

''Hikaru-sama, do you remember how he turned out to be like this?''

Hearing this, Hikaru nodded sadly. Resting against the chair, his eyelids fluttered close before reopening again.

''It was my fault. If I did not get into that car accident…'' He was cut off rudely.

''Nonsense! It was not your fault, Hikaru-sama! It was no one's fault! It could not be helped! After your car accident, Kaoru-sama worried for you! You laid in a coma! He was plagued by the constant stress of losing you! That caused him to become…like this…''

Before she knew it, he was gone.

''I am not crazy! I am not!''

Kaoru tripped over a stone and his face fell flat onto the ground. His face was now caked in mud and mingled together with the salty tears which ran freely down his cheeks.

''He is dead, isn't he? Isn't he?''

Suddenly, a force picked him up and he could faintly feel soft hands cradling his cheeks and wiping away his fallen tears.

Basking in the comforting feeling that these invisible hands gave, he slowly slipped into sleep. Before his eyes closed, he swore he could hear something but shrugged that thought away.

[Hikaru's PoV]

As I cradled his head in my lap, I sighed in bliss.

I was well aware that Kaoru was suffering from this odd psychosis. He believes that I am dead. Even if he cannot see me, I will still support him silently. That is what older brothers do, right? To take care of their little brothers, to care for them.

Actually, thinking back, it was somehow that girl, Haruhi's fault. She was actually in the car. Because she saw him talking to a girl earlier, she misunderstood. She thought that he was cheating on her. He tried to stay focused on the road as she kept on ranting. That only proved to make her more irritated as she grabbed hold of the steering wheel and the car spinned out of control. She survived with some injuries and after that, her family ordered him never to see her again after demanding for compensation. They moved away and never came back.

He glanced at Kaoru's face and saw him closing his eyes, covering his golden pools of sorrow.

''Kaoru, please see me for who I am. I am not dead…I love you Kaoru…Please recover…please…''

**So what did you guys think? Kaoru is suffering from some weird delusion. It is a little twist based on a real-life delusional disorder. A delusional disorder whereby the sufferer believes that they are dead or immortal. But in this case, Kaoru thinks his brother is dead.**

**I believe it is called Cotard delusion. Go look it up. **

**Thank you all, Kukiko! Please go ahead and reviewww!**


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